Contact: Member, Alliance to Restore the Republic

United National Committee of the Unity Party of America

unitednationalcommittee@gmail.com

www.unitypartyamerica.us

2026 RELEASE #15 FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Presented by Tours United

Bomb-Bomb-Bomb Rope-a-Dopin’ Iran?

Tuesday, March 10, 2026 (Bad Kreuznach, Germany) – The Unity Party Founder takes a break from channeling his inner Patton by breaking out of another beachhead to warn that the dead cat is merely bouncing (or is that dropping?).

“At the risk of piling on, I’d like to suggest to Herr Bundeskanzler that the next time he visits the land where my acerbic wit was forged, he be prepared to stand up for democracy and the rule of law, in other words, stand up to the bully who bull*****ed his way to the bully pulpit,” says United National Committee Chair Bill Hammons, “Enough is enough, and we now have a bale full of last straws. The most powerful man in the world (until he gets a kick in the arse by the new more-extreme-than-his-father-and-I-don’t-wanna-know-what-that-means Ayatollah) last week effectively said he could take any airbase he wants (what’s next, Herr Bundeskanzler? RAMSTEIN?). With this president’s new war of pure choice you held the right cards, but now you’re on the ropes, Herr Bundeskanzler, and we ain’t talkin’ the Persian rope-a-dope. Perhaps you should’ve stopped by a DC Starbucks and caffeinated your way to realizing maybe Monsieur Macron could provide the kern for a new United States. Force de frappucino, anyone?

“Apologies to the world from a Chairman woken up at 2:30 by a Denglish nightmare ending with a siren and the words Rakete attack! (Think of my role as that of the Artificial Fool for now, speaking Truth to Power.) God bless the Bad Dubbers (sorry for making your lives hell, folks, and we’ll hug it out, even if I’m not done with you or my fellow Rhinelanders, once I receive the unconditional surrender of my hometown vis-à-vis my residency permit). And a reminder to all that this Friday will be another Forward (note that, in light of the increasing benighting of America and the resulting translatio imperii back to Europe, we’ll be experimenting with Forward Fridays starting at 12 noon Mountain Time, or one hour earlier than before). And speaking of Forward Fridays, the 2026 Unity Party (inter)national convention will be online at the April 10th Forward Friday, also starting at 12 noon MT (30-day deadline now duly observed). Forward UP.”

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About the Unity Party of America

The Unity Party, dedicated solely to helping humankind find common ground and pragmatic solutions, is an FEC-recognized political party in the United States with a national presence (the Unity Party has 1000s and 1000s of officially-affiliated voters in Colorado alone) and recognition in multiple states around the world. The home of Unitism can be found at unitypartyamerica.us and on social media at https://bsky.app/profile/unityparty.bsky.social, facebook.com/unitypartyofamerica, instagram.com/unitypartyamerica, tiktok.com/@unitypartyamerica, twitter.com/unitypartyus, & youtube.com/@unitypartyamerica.

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This communication paid for by the United National Committee of the Unity Party of America to advance the liberation of future Unity Party voters. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate’s committee, nor any authoritarian regime anywhere in the world.